Well, not quite, but it seems like my various blogs (all two of them) seem to correspond with different epochs in my life.
I started this blog to document my thoughts and feelings as I moved to a new area to embark on a new path, and share my struggles as a young woman with a Spinal Cord Injury, addressing issues like sex, dating, depression, identity. When I arrived in Boston, I was on a set academic/professional path (medicine) and climbing was not in the picture at all. Discovering that I could still climb again has been a joyous and frustrating journey. I found that as I got back into climbing again, doubts about my chosen professional path surfaced and grew. When I decided to quit my old job at Google, volunteer in Guatemala and then embark on the pre-med post-bac program in Cambridge, I made this decision based on the belief that I would not be very ambulatory/mobile again, not be able to do much in the way of physical activity, and therefore, what I did professionally had to be all-consuming and my life's work. Naturally, medicine fit this bill quite well. I had wanted something good to come out of what was otherwise a really shitty thing, and I wanted to transform my experiences as a patient and use my analytical abilities to help others.
As I got more into climbing, I realized that climbing, being outside, traveling were all, still, really big parts of my life and that I could still derive immense fulfillment from this aspect of my life. Fulfilling this part of me that needed to be expressed did not seem compatible with the lifestyle of a medical student for the next 8-10 years. I also did not fancy the economic and romantic opportunity costs, which seemed especially high for someone in their 30's.
I struggled with worries that I would experience a tremendous feeling of failure if I abandoned this path. I also thought about the immense changes I had effected in my life to do all this: quit a good job, leave friends, beautiful weather and scenery and a place I loved, good Mexican food...for, the Northeast. But then, I reminded myself of the sunk-cost fallacy; these were not reasons for me to lose even more time toiling away at something I wasn't sure I was completely passionate and committed to.
In the spring, I made the decision not to sit the MCAT examination and apply to medical school. I needed to figure out next steps and also make a bit of money to support myself, after having eaten through my savings the last few years as I was a student. I put the job of finding my next job/pursuit on hold, while I trained for Paraclimbing Nationals and the World Paraclimbing Championships. After I returned from Spain, the job hunt began in earnest. Things were magnified even more by my injuries and being super-down about what I was doing with my life if I wasn't training for climbing.
I mulled over a number of options, including more schooling but in the PsyD/PhD in Psychology route; but, in the end, practical financial realities won over and I decided I needed to find paid employment. I have always had an interest in issues related to energy; thus, I accepted a position at a Cambridge energy economics consulting firm. Check them out: http://www.synapse-energy.com/
I've just finished my second week at this company. Oh, I had to use a pic from Paraclimbing Nationals as my official company website headshot for the time-being, while I wait for a photographer to take "proper" photos: http://www.synapse-energy.com/our-team
I think it is hilarious that every one is dressed up (somewhat; casual is definitely the usual dress-code unless we are meeting clients offsite, giving testimony etc etc) whereas I'm looking in the other direction, covered in chalk.
I am going to cease posting to this blog and move over to another site. I've registered a domain name, but need to find the time to get that website together/going. I will certainly make an announcement when my new site is up and running.